DVD
CSI: Miami
Season 1 - Part 2

Starring: David Caruso, Emily Procter and Adam Rodriguez
Momentum Pictures
RRP: £39.99
MP287D
Certificate: 15
Available 21 February 2005


Chronicling the work of the Miami-Dade crime investigators, CSI: Miami is set against the sun, fun and tropics of the Florida tourist haven. Leading the team is Horatio Caine, an ex-bomb squad detective who is no stranger to confrontations with criminals and the underworld...

The second half of season one of CSI: Miami doesn't get off to a good start. Bunk is a rather dull episode. Here the crime lab investigates the death of a man who was found dead in a neighbour's house after accidentally inhaling a lethal cocktail of chemicals. In another part of the city, an old age pensioner is found dead in a pool of blood, in what appears to be a vicious murder. Sadly, getting to the bottom of both of these deaths just seems to drag on and on.

This is followed by the better, but slightly odd Forced Entry. In this episode a rapist is found dead, having been sexually assaulted in the same style he subjected his victims to. I was a little confused as to why it was the CSI team that had to tell the police to go and interview the partners of the dead man's previous victims. Surely that would have happened immediately when it was obvious that whoever committed the murder had detailed knowledge of how the dead man raped his victims.

Sadly, as the episodes in this box set unfold, it becomes more and more apparent that Miami's local law enforcement are as thick as two short planks. While that's not the case, I'm sure, in real life why is it that the crime lab are always telling other agencies how to do their jobs.

I've said it before, in my review of Season 1 - Part 2, but Horatio 'H' Caine must be about the most annoying lead character in any mainstream show. He's a cocky know it all who you just want to punch in the face - repeatedly. Why does he always know everything within ten seconds of being at the crime scene? Why does he know how to do everybody's job better then them? Why is he so annoying?

What am I talking about? Let's take the episode Dipo Day as an example. Here Cain and Speedle are involved in a shoot out when they are part of a convoy headed to the local incinerator in order to destroy a quantity of confiscated drugs. The criminals make off with the drugs and everything points to a member of CSI being the leak. So far, that's pretty straight forward. However Caine thinks that the mother who crashed her car, causing the accident, may know something. Why? Not because she caused the accident, and therefore is probably in on it, but because when the accident happened and everyone opened fire, she screams "Not my baby!" as her child is in the back of the car. For some reason Caine believes she was screaming that it was not her baby, while the audience thinks, quite rightly, that she is screaming because she doesn't want her baby to be injured. And guess what? Caine is right again! Sorry, I rewatched that sequence and his theories (although proved right) are cod!

Then in Grave Young Men Caine gets to play Scooby-Doo all on his own. He is approached by a man he framed for murder years before and wants Caine to help him find his son who has vanished. When Caine examines the boys bedroom he realises that the kid had recently shot a gun from his bedroom window, and then finds that the gun was fired into a tree in his garden. Then, for reasons never fully explained, Cain gets someone to cut the tree down and take a large chunk of it into the CSI lab. Now why did he do this? Having guns in America is hardly surprising. All you'd figure from this is that the kid shot off a few rounds into a tree. But no, Caine thinks (and you know he's going to be right) that something more sinister is the cause. This really is stretching a storyline to the max.

But, by far the most unbelievable Caine storyline is saved for the final episode, Body Count. Called to investigate a murder in a prison, Caine spots a helicopter, works out that the murder is a decoy for a prison breakout, seems to be a better marksman than the prison guards, and then grabs the prison radio and orders those on the other side of the radio to track the chopper. So he has managed to do the jobs of several people who are just running around looking confused while he takes charge of the situation - oh, please!

Part of the charm and success of CSI: Crime Scene Investigation was the fact that there were so many likeable characters. CSI: Miami revolves around Caine, bringing in the other characters as background faces. This means that ultimately this is a one character show - and it just doesn't work.

By far the best character is chief medical examiner Alexx Woods, M.D (played by Khandi Alexander). To start with she doesn't feature too heavily, but when she does she gives a warmth to the character - there are several episodes where she talks to the dead bodies, like a mother, as she is working on them. Finally, in the episode Freaks and Tweaks she has to perform an autopsy on the body of one of her oldest friends - on being told that he is dead, her acting is amazingly convincing.

And I wish they'd tone down the music a little too! In one scene Caine states: "We're chasing the cook." Sadly, due to his mumbling and the background music it sounded like: "We're chasing the cock." Very unfortunate. I had to go back and watch that scene again with subtitles on to find out what he had actually said.

Sadly, to date, this series is not a patch on CSI: Crime Scene Investigation. While there are some interesting episodes, the fact that Caine is constantly fitting the evidence to fit his crazy theories beggars belief.

Amber Leigh

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£30.74 (Amazon.co.uk)
   
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All prices correct at time of going to press.